So the thing about raising
four girls, all at different ages and stages, is that there is always a
problem. Ok, yes there is also always a blessing too...a new stage or skill that’s
very exciting. Let's face it though, as parents there are more tears shed and
hair greyed over the challenges than the blessings.
Before I had four daughters
I could never have imagined how completely different in personality four little
girls can be.
My eldest daughter has
always been extremely cautious. She was the kid on the playground that stuck to
the swings because there was always the possibility she may fall off of the
climbing equipment. She learned to walk late because she would not let go of
the couch until she was certain she would not fall. As she has gotten older
that caution has extended into many other aspects of her life, which makes it
difficult to get her to try things outside her comfort zone. She has a
tendency, like many girls her age, to believe the world will actually fall
apart if she doesn't succeed at absolutely everything she attempts. The newest installment
of "The Dramatic Tribulations of Bookworm" is her extreme distaste
with the world of mathematics. You see, she has had the mixed blessing and
curse of having a natural inclination towards reading, and to a lesser degree,
writing. She taught herself to read in the summer between preschool and
kindergarten, and has been fully immersed in the literature world ever since.
Reading comes easily to her, and is enjoyable, so she has always been several grade
levels above her age in that category. You can imagine her chagrin however,
when she realized that just because reading came easily to her, it didn't mean
everything else would. In fact, I still don't know if she fully embraces the
concept that she may actually need to WORK at learning something. I have tried
the mom spiels of "learning means practice" and "practice makes
perfect" but her general reaction towards a difficult math concept is to
slam the book shut and proclaim, "I can't do it, this is stupid." So
here is where we are now...with a stupid mathbook full of things she can't do.
The silly thing is, when I sit down with her and go through the problem solving
steps, she CAN do it. As soon as I leave and she is left to her own devices she
shuts down and won't even attempt it. After talking with some other parents I
am not sure if this is personality or age related, but I guess I won't know
that until Sunshine gets a few years older. In the meantime, Bookworm has
entered a new school this year and their academic focus for the year is...you
guessed it...numeracy. So perhaps things will change if her challenge is one
that the children around her are sharing. Thankfully her proclivity towards
caution does not extend to making friends, as she approaches everyone with openhearted
good nature and is one of the best friends I have ever met. She really does
enjoy putting others first, and because of that she generally does not have any
problem making friends. One less thing to expend my "Mom Worry Allowance"
on.
I do believe that as
parents we have a certain amount of worry that we can withstand before we lose
our shit. (You have to love a blog that is peppered with both curse words, and
vocabulary choices that may have some of my readers reaching for a dictionary...blame
my background in English Literature and marrying truck drivers...but I
digress...). I don't think I have actually exceeded that threshold, but I would
be lying if I said I didn't walk the line on a regular basis. My other
"problem child" of the moment would be Stormy. This isn't really
unusual, as she is most definitely the little firecracker in my bunch. At two
and a half years old, Stormy has a vocabulary that rivals most first graders,
and an attitude to match. Whoever told her all little girls can be a princess
if they want to should be shot. This little girl truly believes she was
destined to be royalty and should be treated as such. A petite twenty-three
pounds of tutu-wearing fury, Stormy has big ideas and no lack of self-confidence
to get her there. Our current challenge is with the concept of potty training.
Both of Stormy’s older sisters followed the same progression when it was time
to ditch the diapers. First I suggested that perhaps they would like to get rid
of the diapers and try big girl underwear! This was followed by a fight to get
said child to even SIT on the potty, then every bribe imaginable, followed
lastly by tears (from Mommy) and a resignation that they were not going to even
attempt to potty train. In both cases, within a month of my momentous failure
to interest them in the concept, they decided that diapers were for babies and
trained themselves. Then along came Stormy. She has a completely different
relationship with diapers. She LOVES them. They are her security blanket. Not
only has she flat out refused any attempt to bribe her to try training pants or
a potty, but she actually gets hysterical at the idea of letting them go. So I
decided to follow the same pattern as before, backing off and watching for her
interest to pique on its own. It’s been 5 months. I asked her yesterday if she
was interested in trying on some Frozen undies and she threw herself on the box
of pull-ups sobbing that she "can't" because the diapers are hers and
she "NEEDS" them! Back to the drawing board. This is the child that
just walked up to me writing this and said "I would love you to get up off
of the couch and get me some crackers" she is a tiny dictator I am telling
you. Now before the SanctiMommies start crawling all over me, we do not allow
the kids to speak to us disrespectfully and I did have her repeat herself using
the appropriate please and thank you. I just find it funny that her natural
inclination is to speak as if she truly is the princess she believes she was
born to be.
Well, that is enough
rambling for today. I am off to try and convince my girls that the hurricane
look is not a good one for a bedroom to have, and that cheese and crackers do
not count as a vegetable.
Hang in there mommies.
Mama Blue Out.
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